Notes from the Underground
Notes from the Underground Introduction
Welcome everyone! This is Luchador, your WWFTX host.
April 12, 2025
We're excited to launch WWFTX. WWFTX is a predictions market for pro wrestling matches. I'm Luchador, your WWFTX host and head of kayfabe data analytics.
WWFTX's Mission. Why?
Why would anyone bet on pro wrestling matches, you ask? The outcomes are pre-determined, right? Yes, it's true, it's true. The outcomes are pre-determined. But can you actually predict the outcomes? Do you know what's going to happen? That is the question. I don't know the answer, but I'll try to learn with you, our millions and millions of fans.
How will we try to learn about match outcomes? What are your methods?
Technology: One strategy is to use cutting-edge technology. We'll try to build a cutting edge model that utilizes Tensorflow processing units (TPU's), Graphic processing units (GPU's), and Zyn nicotine patches. We'll then gather data on all the matches that have ever taken place and then our proprietary model ("our oracle, if you will") will divine the outcomes for us. Easy money, right? These TPU's and GPU's have cost us $10 million USD so far, so we've got a ways before we make our money back.
Fundamental research: Another strategy is following wrestling closely for deep clues. This could be things from the dirt sheets, like Dave Meltzer's blog and tweets. John Cena and the Rock's filming schedule may provide clues. Our team of research analysts listens to hours and hours of shoot interviews to understand the psychology behind match bookings.
Historical statistical data: We're gathering data on matches to figure out if they provide any clues to the future. If the writers at WWE have any tendencies, the data may pick this up.
Ok, that's it for now. I'll come back shortly and handicap the upcoming Wrestlemania 41 matches.
"Give a man a mask, and he will tell you the truth." – Oscar Wilde
